Chicago, IL, 2021-Sep-07 — /EPR INTERNET NEWS/ — V3 – The Most Technologically Advanced Statistical Tracking Device in Baseball History
In 1989 we unveiled SHAWON-O-METER, a crude yet catchy device that calculated batting average – simple division using at-bats and hits. Shawon Dunston caught fire and the Chicago Cubs were one step from the World Series.
In 2015 we increased capacity by replacing hits with total bases – slugging percentage. SCHWARB-O-METER pushed ciphering to the outer limits, befuddling even Joe Buck during Game Two of the 2016 World Series. Kyle Schwarber was a key contributor, helping the Cubs win it all.
And now, following Moore’s Law, we introduce SCHWIND-O-METER. Cubs vs San Francisco Giants, continuing the grand tradition of solar-powered/spreadsheet math while boisterously showing off the results to anyone within earshot. And what will we be tracking? The Grand Poohbah – OPS. Two bloated stats added together producing one eye-bulging result. Here’s to Frank Schwindel’s continued success in a Cub’s uniform.